What's Your Mental Brew?
TRANSCRIPT:
Hi! My name is Sherri Wilson! And welcome to Work Your Biz Like a Boss—the one-stop shop podcast for everything business. I’m about to make a statement that might offend you, but I promise that if you keep listening, you’ll discover keys to help you! Ok, here it is: It’s a myth that events or circumstances cause stress. The truth is that stress is caused by your perception of those events.
I can already hear some of you. What do you mean an impending divorce isn’t causing me stress? Or my lack of employment is causing me stress? Or my impending bankruptcy isn’t causing me stress? Or a global pandemic isn’t causing me stress?
HAVE YOU NOTICED?
Have you ever noticed how some go through crises and difficulties much better than others? You can have two people going through the exact or at least similar crises and one person is thriving and the other is barely surviving. One always has a great attitude and is hopeful while the other is depressed, anxious, and possibly suicidal. Why? Why is it that one person thrives and one doesn’t?
Perception.
PERCEPTION
We think 60,000-70,000 thoughts per day, and 70% of those are negative. And most of them are taking place in our subconscious—under the surface.
“You don’t make progress by standing on the sidelines, whimpering and complaining. You make progress by implementing ideas.”
Your subconscious is like an iceberg. What you see on top is small compared to what’s underneath. Your perceptions are sourced in your subconscious meaning you might perceive things not from facts plainly seen but from thoughts unseen. You take that “data” and feed it into the subconscious. And the funny thing about the subconscious is it only executes the data you give it—whether good or bad.
Scripts
Often we don’t know that our subconscious perceptions are hurting us or how big they are until our dreams and goals collide with our subconscious scripts stopping progress and making us feel stressed!
What exactly are scripts? Scripts are the “mental brew” powerful enough to direct emotions and actions. Learned norms become subconscious scripts. Everything you learned about yourself and life from others and experiences make up your scripts, again, good or bad.
Often you don’t know you’re swimming around in a script until it’s pointed out by others or circumstances.
““Two fish are swimming in a pond when
an older fish starts swimming the other
way towards them. When the older fish
passes them, he nods and says, “Good
morning! How’s the water?” The two fish
swim for a while before one of them looks
to the other and asks, “What the hell is
water?””
The Brain’s Bias
On top of negative scripts and perceptions, your brain has a natural negative bias in order to keep you alive, which is why we recognize angry faces more quickly, overestimate threats, underestimate opportunities, and over-learn from bad experiences. Throw in negative thought patterns (scripts) and you might find yourself depressed and anxious! Plus negative thoughts lead to more negative thoughts, which literally shapes your physical brain if left unchecked.
Two Types of Scripts
Ripples are the subtle scripts playing in the background that “seem” normal.
Waves are the scripts that crash down on you creating mental and emotional distress.
It’s important to learn to recognize each script type, and as my good friend and counselor, Coach Greg McNeil teaches, “Let your scripts mentor you.” When you recognize a ripple script or feel a wave script crashing, you can use them as opportunities to expose the source of the negative script and retrain your subconscious.
how to get unstuck
Recognize. Sometimes just the act of recognizing the script is enough to effect change. But it’s definitely the first step and most important if you think about it (pun intended). How can you change your scripts if you don’t know what they are?
Challenge your thinking. Do you really believe the script or did you inherit the thought?
Retrain your subconscious. It only understands data and present-tense and is geared to process faith. Vision boards and words spoken in faith are great ways to retrain.
Be kind to yourself like you would a friend. This takes time. When you find yourself thinking the same ole way, don’t beat yourself up! Recognize it and get back to work!
Stay on top of it. The brain’s neural pathways fight off new neural pathways. Literally. Keep working on that new way of thinking because eventually the old neural pathway will dissolve and the new one will get stronger.
ONE MORE GREAT TIP
When Coach Greg and I did this training in person at our local Chamber, he said a great way to retrain your subconscious is to purchase a journal and a blue pen (because blue ink helps with memory) and write down your desires each day. He said to only record those that are an 8-10 on a scale of 1-10 in desire. This inspires hope, motivation to change, and aspiration, which is one of the most powerful motivators.